Feeling
motivated and full of purpose
This feeling
pushes people to act in a determined way and to propose specific,
effective, concrete and reachable objectives.
A person
with self-esteem knows what he wants to achieve and he finds out how
to do it in the short, medium and long term. His energy is directed
at specific tasks and he feels satisfied when he achieves what he
originally proposed.
Having
lack of direction and purpose subtracts motivation from making a real
effort to carry out objectives, as the person isn’t necessary
convinced.
Parents
can motivate their children to act in a specific way by showing them
confidence. The expectations that a father has for each of his children
varies. Sometimes these expectations respond only to desires and to
preconceptions.
Often,
these expectations are the reflections of paternal frustration from
their childhood. The parents transfer to their children, the desires
that they had as children. Expecting too much can overwhelm the child
and harm his self-esteem if he doesn’t manage to fulfil his
parent’s requirements.
This type
of situation can leave the child frustrated and with a high sense
of negative insufficiency. Sometimes the parent’s expectations
on one of their children can cause jealously amongst the brothers
and sisters and harm their self-esteem.
It is good
for parents to want their children to be successful, but the children
have to motivate themselves, they need to use their own initiative,
creativity, effort, interest and personal success and not act just
because their parents ask them of expect it of them.
A child
will always put a lot of effort into his objectives when he knows
that his parents have faith in him and his capacity to reach his objectives.
Characteristics
of a child with little motivation and no purpose
1. He doesn’t
show any initiative. He does what is expected of him without taking
any risks.
2. He
often seems bored as he doesn’t look for alternatives or solutions.
3. He
doesn’t have any objectives therefore he doesn’t have
any results.
4. He
often asks himself: why should I bother if I am not interested?
5. He
feels useless and incapable; he looks for attention by screaming and
moaning – this makes him feel comfortable.
6. He
rarely carries out, in a satisfactory way, his school work or homework,
etc.
7. He feels
like he isn’t capable of doing things, therefore, he doesn’t
think it is worth trying.
8. He finds
it difficult to make his own decisions. If there isn’t enough
motivation, it’s not work making a decision.
9. He doesn’t
worry about the quality of the work that he does.
10. He
doesn’t assume his responsibilities and he usually blames his
mistakes on others or on the circumstances.
11. He
is reactive instead of being proactive. His way of thinking means
he doesn’t take the initiative and therefore doesn’t come
across any difficulties.
